Out with the Outs in Africa

Last night Richard and I went to a movie premier. It was a free screening hosted by Out in Africa. Now I am not sure how I got onto the Out in Africa mailing list in the first place - in fact I can't even access the web site from here ... http://www.oia.co.za/ as it is barred and deemed not work related and unsuitable. Pah!

Out in Africa refers to 'Out of the closest'. I am not sure if it is gay & lesbian or lesbian-specific, but last night's premier was a lesbian soirie for sure. ;)

Richard was distinctly out numbered, and was one of only a handful of men (if that) and probably the only hetero man there. Tee hee. The women ranged from big, butch and manly, through hippy, all the way to quite attractive and stylish. It's nice to see that not everyone feels the need to be agrro and uber-dykey anymore, and many looked and seemed very pleasant. I had previously held the belief that I thought gay men were cool because they are attractive and appealing, whereas the women almost seemed to make an effort to be **unattractive** and unapproachable, and I found that a bit off-putting and well - unattractive. The result was I have always been totally cool with gay men but vaguely freaked out by 'women in comfortable shoes'.

It seems that this has progressed to a comfortable place where people can express themselves , as they are, freely and without having to make bold and outrageous statements to the public at large, and I like that. It's like people have realised that looking and feeling attractive is as much for yourself and your own self-satisfaction as for anyone else, and it's not just to lure and/or gratify men. So being a greasy, smelly lard-bucket really isn't necessary and doesn't prove any point other than that you have bad standards of hygiene.

Now, you can be who you are and I can be who I am, and there's no reason for us not to accept each other and exist along side each other whether we understand each other's choices or not.

So on to the movie. I was expecting something grungy and low budget and well OUT there, the kind of avante-guarde art-house movie we used to go watch at the Labia 5-10 years ago. But it was really very main-stream, accessable, well produced and rather touching. It is a British movie called 'Imagine You & Me'.

You will recognise several of the cast members, including Anthony Head (James from Man Child etc) - who I think is a combination of John Lithgow and what Dave will look like when he gets older, and Darren Boyd (Craig from Kiss Me Kate) looking a bit older, and Celia Imrie from loads of things including Wah-Wah and Nany McPhee, and you may know Matthew Goode - who I found rather yummy in a soft and gentle way - who has an almost exact Hugh Grant manner of speaking.

The 2 leading women Piper Perabo & Lena Headey are distrubingly similar to other people. Lena looks a lot like a normal sized Lara Flynn Boyle mixed with a mid-wife I know - Glynnis, and Piper looks like several people from Amanda Peet, to Julia Roberts, to Ashleigh Olsen (!) and even a bit of Angelina Jolie and Hillary Duff etc. Of course she is that girl from Coyote Ugle who dances on tables! They were very similar, yet subetly diffferent in their roles, and the connection and chemistry between them was quite tangible.

Basically the story is that Rachel (Piper) gets married to Heck (Matthew) and Luce (Lena) is the florist for the wedding. Rachel first sees Luce, in a fleeting glance acorss the room, as she is walking down the isle to be married, and is instantly intrigued and smitten with her. At first she thinks it is just friendship she is feeling, but it turns out that Luce is gay and they are both very attracted to each other...

"Synopsis: In a singular moment of sudden awakening on the altar, everything changes for Rachel when she is suddenly forced to reconsider the meaning of happily ever after on entirely new terms moments before her honeymoon has even started. When Rachel shows up at the church on what promises to be a fairy-tale wedding day, she is thrilled to be devoting herself for life to her long-time sweetheart and best friend, Heck. That's when the unthinkable happens. In a moment that overturns everything in which she thought she believed, Rachel catches the eye of a complete stranger, the wedding's florist, and like a bolt from the blue, recognizes her soul mate. Though she moves ahead with the marriage, something has profoundly changed. Everything about life is suddenly in question; and Rachel and her brand new husband are thrust into a journey that is at once disarmingly funny, decidedly bittersweet and definitely familiar to anyone who has ever fallen--for better or for worse--under love's intoxicating spell. "

The story is quirky, touching and sentimental with some well timed comedic inclusions too. I would equate it with movies like Notting Hill and Love Actually, it has a similar feel to it. Some of the comments I over heard after the movie were that it was 'too Hollywood', but I do think it was a good movie and it introduces the lesbian concept in an easy to understand and digest and in an inoffensive manner. It skillfully shows how the attraction, and chemistry in these relationships is just the same as with heterosexual realtionships, the 2 people just happen to be the same sex. It also shows the contrast beween a 'settled for' heterosexual relationship and a 'the one' gay relationship. So from a bringing understanding, acceptance and tolerance of gayness to the general public I think this film will do a lot of good. However I agree that it is probably more a gay film for straight people than a gay film for gay people.

Still it was an enjoyable movie, followed by Chocolate cake and coffee and heated/animated debate on everything from Madonna and adoption to George W(anker) Bush and North Korea to Helen Zille and Jacob Zuma :)