Thinking & Feeling

“The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” Horace Walpole

Monday, 9 July 2012

BEEG Catch-all catch-up

I have been been ridiculously busy recently. Faaaar too busy actually, and that makes me harried, stressed, tired and generally not that happy. We had some tight and very pressurised deadlines at work and there was a lot of politics. It made me not very fun/funny for a while.

Thankfully that wave has passed now - although there are more on the way! I'll just have to find a way to deal with them functionally and not get quite so consumed by it all I guess.

It's weird that I am working harder than at my last job - the one I HATED- even, and that was tough, but I am actually so much happier. At least what we do here seems appreciated and valued. So it's not soul-destroying and crappy. It's actually fun sometimes and I enjoy the environment and challenge. But it is a little full-throttle and relentless at times.

For 3 months I worked around 200 hours a month (I am meant to do about 140!), I did very little else besides work, eat, run and sleep and there was precious little parenting, fun, socialising or anything else. I am not generally much of a 'mommy-guilt' kind of person, but I will admit I started having some. My boys have just NOT had enough time, attention or nurturing from me in the past few months. If anything THEY have looked after me. It does make me feel very guilty and even a bit regretful. At the same time I feel a lot of pride and gratitude for them. They are very mature, helpful and responsible (most of the time). I do love those 2 very very much.

Anyway I woke up on a Wednesday morning 6 weeks ago and had a stiff neck. I didn't think too much of it. I thought I'd just slept badly. This was after 4 weeks of lingering flu and chest infections, and 2 migraines in one month (after not having one for almost a year). The neck pain did not get better and just kept getting worse. It became a huge headache. The neck and headache became pretty all-consuming. I found that the only thing that seemed to help was running, strangely enough. The rest of the time I was in agony. I was waking up at night in pain, holding my head at work, and just willing it to stop - or for death to come swiftly. I would have chosen either! I took headache tablets, muscle relaxants, anti-inflamatories. Me, who never takes any meds or goes to the doctor. I was ready to try anything, I just wanted relief!!

As I said running helped. One week I ran... wait for it... 60km! But I had to do something about it. Not even yoga was helping at all, and I was not able to do my yoga class properly, it was a problem. So off I went to the Chiro. I was last there 6 years ago, when my back seized up when I was working round-the-clock for the Ubuntu project (spotting a trend?). Anyway he is GREAT. He remembered everything about me, and what I told him about the boys. I have now been for 3 sessions and after the first it was not as tight, after the second I was better and after the 3rd on Friday I am FIXED! Can I say it again? He is GREAT! I can not describe just how much it is improving my mood and general disposition to not be in discomfort and pain ALL. THE. TIME. Halle-freaking-luja! :) Wheeeee! My sense of humour has come back and my ability to cope is restored. I feel like I can deal with everything calmly again, because I don't feel like I am am in a deathly vice-grip all the time.

Bye bye monkey on my back! I really am so so happy to feel normal and healthy again.

I'll try to catch-up here as I can too. I still need to post about my birthday week-end, my friend's 40th in Grabouw, the #Moonlightmass cycles we've been doing and some big big  BIG news. Something life changing I am very probably doing soon.... I am sure I will get mixed and probably strong reactions to that!

As for this past week it has rained and rained and rained and rained and rained, and it seems there is much more on the way.

On Wednesday we were invited to a 4th of July party, with A's friends Graham and Kerry. It was a fun evening. Lots of good food and company. We had to dress the part and as usual if looking like an idiot is an option I excel at it. I dressed in everything red, white and blue. (including under wear - red bra and star-spangled panties!) And added my 'Little Miss Jihad' t-shirt for good measure and to be controversial and antagonistic - as is my wont! :)

We had a lovely indulgent, rich and comforting roast dinner with our neighbours on Friday night. Roast lamb, roast chicken, roast potatoes and winter veg, rich gravy, Apple pie and custard and lots of wine. It was a lovely way to end the week and completely lifted my spirits and filled and warmed my soul.

On Saturday thanks to the relentless rain, my neck being fixed, and work settling down, I had time and energy to get up to date on my admin and filing and have even submitted my tax return. YAY! I usually procrastinate on that a little. So it feels good to have it done. :) 

The weather cleared for a while in the late morning so I went for a nice long (17km) run. It was wonderful and despite not feeling super fit or strong it was a wonderful run. The Nike+ goodie I have was well-impressed with me afterwards. I got 6 awards! :)

The boys and I went to Canal Walk to do some shopping and I took them to Wimpy for a burger afterwards.

On Sunday there really was a SHIT load of rain! It was almost unbelievable. I'd actually love to know how much fell. We decided it was the perfect ice-skating day, and so instead of hibernating, like the rest of Cape Town, we headed out. Milner Road had a river running down the side of it and I went down Old Farm road and the whole road was flooded. So I of course did the mature and adult thing and speed up and zoomed through it creating a huge spray and splash everywhere. For a second I thought I might break my car and almost thought the water was going to come through the doors! But we survived and carried on and it was FUN! :)

The ice-skating was great. I managed to get over my fear (after a bad fall previously and the broken ankle injury) and skated non-stop for 2 hours. Griff is getting really good too. Afterwards I let the boys go the the games arcade and we played some games together and then had popcorn and coffees before heading home, for a warm bath (after I snuck in a 10km run because the weather was suddenly clear as we got home) yummy soup and sweet pepper bread for dinner!

It was a lovely winter's day.

All in a all a good week-end and I feel relaxed and recharged and ready to go again. I even wore a short skirt and tights to work! :)

Other random things:
- I see SPUD 2 is being filmed at SACS at the moment. I keep running past signs.
- My running draw-string bag broke while running last week and I have lost my gym cards, and some money, but thankfully my credit card, cell hone and house keys were not lost!
- I saw Ice Age 4 with the boys. It was fun.
- Quinn is growing suddenly and every time I see him he seems taller. He is eating a lot suddenly and is also extending his independence and likes to cycle to the shops and back. About 2kms each way. He'll ask me if I need anything from the shop now and will volunteer to go for me. :)

1 comment:

  1. I love these update posts. Glad to hear all is busy, but well.