His mom phoned me on Saturday*. I had to tell her that I am sorry but I can tell her no more about him and am really through with caring about him now. I said I was not trying to be mean or callous but that I feel I have gone the distance and won't do anymore. If he comes around and behaves and communicates appropriately I will probably reciprocate but I won't try to initiate anything now. I think she understood.
(*She phones about once a month or so, and I try to talk to her when I can. I send her general news and photos in letters - mostly to avoid having to call myself. She is not my favourite person, but I can tell she is trying, and her son has refused to speak to her AT ALL since we split up LAST April. So I have been her source of info up to now. But I really can't help her any further wrt him and have no advice for her. I said I really don't know him anymore and have no idea if he'll ever have any kind of functional relationship with any of us again.
She found out I had given him the R5k she had given me and told me off, because she said that was to help me not him. I think in some way she feels a bit responsible for his actions - from being related to him and as his parent. It is really very sad.)
He seems to be cutting everyone out of his life now. His own mother! Thats sad.
ReplyDeleteYou've definintely done the right thing.
he is indeed an icky rash.
ReplyDeleteHonestly Jane I do think its better to have no contact with him at all.
ReplyDeleteHe is destructive for you all :(
Sorry that the boys are sort of put in the middle of it - its not fair!
URGH - I am so sorry that this is a never-ending saga for you.
ReplyDeleteOne keeps hoping people will see the light but it seems some never do
ReplyDeleteIt is sad indeed. I am glad though that between the two of you she can stay up to date on the boys.
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