RIP Granny Betty

I feel quiet numb and immobile.
I have done almost nothing since I heard the news. I am all indecisive and confused almost.

I was on my way to yoga at the time I go the call and I didn't go and have done virtually nothing else either.

What am I meant to be DOING!?

She was so ill and has been so so much better. I had a lovely chat to her on the phone 2 weeks ago, and was thinking THIS afternoon ow it's been too long again since I saw her and I must go visit, tomorrow, and then 30 mins later I got the call saying she had passed.

I know she didn't want to suffer and linger so this is probably what she would have wanted... but I feel so sad. This year is proving to be really really tough. Why am I struggling so much with everything?

I need to coordinate stuff now and deal with family who will want to come down again and and and. But right now I don't have the energy to even think about any of that. I am not even sure what to do about work in the morning...

Quinn seems ok, he was loving and wanted to cuddle and touch me. But Griffin seems more upset and was acting grumpy and bratty and difficult, so I think he is going to need more support and attention to deal with it. He is much more sensitive and emotional out of the 2...

REST IN PEACE DARLING AND GRACIOUS GRANNY BETTY. WE LOVE YOU.

She would have been 92 next month. A long and well lived life. Always happy and content. A true inspiration.